Difficult Times, Pearls and a Grain of Sand

Difficult Times, Pearls
and a Grain of Sand…

For those who are undergoing difficult times and want to give up let’s take a look at how a precious pearl is formed.
Is it really formed from a grain of sand?

Not always…
To my surprise I found out it is very rare for sand to be the culprit!

However, the result is the same no matter what the irritant is!  When a clam or other shell is “irritated” a pearl sac is formed.  Then it is bathed continuously by a special secretion until a pearl is formed!

A pearl can take anywhere from 2 – 7 years or more to reach it’s full growth potential.  How does this apply to grief?

How does it apply to the difficult times in our lives when everything seems to be falling apart and life isn’t fair!  I know life does happen and sometimes I don’t like what happens!  Sometimes I wish I could just turn back the clock and make a different choice.
Sometimes I wish I would’ve said something different or did something different.
I find when I am grieving it’s so easy to live in the past…
… with all the shame… with all the regret… with all the guilt… and with all the blame…

I’m in such a world of hurt it seems like my life is consumed by it and I am not seeing any precious pearls!
It seems like I am a prisoner…

Yet, I like to think about a secret weapon that is available to me.
This secret weapon is available to me day and night around the clock 24/7.
This secret weapon is the solution that bathes what is irritating my life and ends up making a pearl!!!
When I have no peace this secret weapon is available.
When I am sad this secret weapon can bring sweet release.
When I am frustrated by loss and difficult times this secret weapon can soothe my wearied mind.
This secret weapon can bathe my soul and bring renewed hope.
This secret weapon most of the time brings me to a place of acceptance and surrender.

This secret weapon is tears.

Do you ever remember a time you were called a crybaby?
I do.
I remember times when I was crying and felt ashamed of my tears.
Talk about vulnerable!!!  I’m feeling vulnerable right now!

I remember times I have been guilty of calling playmates crybaby!  🙁

I shudder at the many times I told our children to STOP CRYING!!!
They certainly didn’t cry all the time…

But you know how it is when they come running to you and they are hurt and in pain…
I would say, “STOP CRYING and tell me what’s wrong.”
I would say, “STOP CRYING or I’ll give you something to cry about.”
Oh the many messages I gave that said “STOP CRYING” like it was something wrong!

I didn’t realize then how precious tears are.
I didn’t realize then how much a soul needs them to keep a clear vision.
I didn’t realize then how important it is to let tears wash the windows of the soul.
Tears are made so we can cry them!
However long that takes and whatever it looks like!
If it takes a whole box of Kleenex… so what?!

Have you had a good cry lately?
Your tears are worth more to your soul than precious pearls!
Indeed, tears are your precious pearls!

I understood when our babies were born that crying was the only way a baby had to communicate that something was wrong.  I paid attention to every little nuance.  I knew when a cry meant I’m hungry.  I knew when a cry meant I’m sleepy or bored.  I even knew when a cry meant I need you and want your love.

What happened?!!
When did crying become something to stifle and stop?
Perhaps it’s time you had a good cry.
Perhaps it’s time I had a good cry!
Precious, precious pearls… these tears of mine!

I know one thing:  I am going to stop saying STOP CRYING!
I’m going to let others know it’s okay to cry.
You don’t have to be strong anymore…

Do not ignore your feelings and stuff them deep inside anymore.
Let them bubble up like a fountain that you will do nothing to stop until the tears stop coming.
Let tears be what keeps the inside of your soul a beautiful receptacle of the most precious pearl ever made.

Thank You, Dear God, for tears… whether happy or sad…
They truly are precious pearls to me.
As the difficult times come and the trials seem long…
Send sweet tears to bathe my soul.
Help me to remember…
I do not have to be strong, nor is there shame in tears…
Still waters can run very deep even in a silent tear upon the cheek…
Remind me that tears are not the mark of weakness but of power…
They speak more eloquently than a thousand tongues…
These messengers of overwhelming grief and unspeakable love…
Thank You again, Lord, for tears!  Amen

hmmmm… anyone got a kleenex?!
With compassion for all tears, (happy or sad and everything in between…)
~Susan Holsinger

Feb. 27, 2012

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